Sharknado (2013) Movie Review

SHARKNADO (2013) MOVIE REVIEW

Every once in a while, there comes a movie that just surprises me in it's quality. Unfortunately in Sharknado's case, it didn't surprise me in a positive way. 

You're going to have to bare with me on this one as the story is just too ridiculous and stupid to explain properly. When a freak hurricane begins heading towards Los Angeles, the locals of the city begin preparing for this natural occurrence  What they didn't expect is a hurricane filled with hundreds upon hundreds of sharks, which cause the sharks to fly in different directions and somehow, by their own freewill. As a result of this, a group of survivors must attempt and survive this "natural" disaster and think of a way to take down the Sharknado. No, I'm not kidding, that is literally the premise of Sharknado. Since I had heard such...things about this movie, I knew what I was to expect but I would have liked the tiniest bit of character or even story development. Instead, we are basically left with a movie that is more or less the rejected scenes from Piranha 3-D. Overall, the story is just awful with no character development and not once during the movie does the premise seem real, the realism could be said about the accents as well. 

Still of Man with no leg

This may be hard to believe, but there is actually something in this movie that is worse than the premise. The special effects in the film are just god awful as literally nothing looks real. When sharks are supposed to be the main aspect of your movie, you would think that they would put effort into their appearance but no, they didn't. Instead, we are left with transparent sharks that can somehow eat a person whole in at max two seconds. If you thought the sharks were the only bad special effects in the film, well think again as the violence and various buildings that get destroyed look incredibly fake. This cannot be more evident than with the Ferris wheel scene as when someone gets crushed by it, it honestly looks like a special effect I have seen by an amateur on YouTube  If people in Hollywood are getting paid to make a movie like this, then why aren't people on the internet, who make better quality films, get paid as well? Uhhhh... Anyhow, the effects in Sharknado were just down right sickening, though this was to be expected when going into the film. 

Still of the Sharknado approaching 

Uhh, do I really have to keep on talking about this movie? Fine. The acting is exactly what you would think it would be. There is no strong actor/actress in the movie and everyone just does an awful job in their respective parts. I feel like the cast for this movie would have worked better if it consisted of people that I actually know. Out of everyone in this movie, there are only two recognizable faces. Tara Reid (known for The Big Lebowski and American Pie) and Jon Heard (known for Home Alone and well, Home Alone 2) and both of these two just deliver terrible performances, and they somehow manage to be the strongest ones in the entire movie. I mean, could you just imagine if this film starred Bruce Willis, Dwanye Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson? I would be more than eager to see a movie like that. Even if the movie was god awful, I would say that the best thing about that movie was those men. However, since I have no interest in John Heard or Tara Reid, I can't really say if there roles in this movie were necessary or not. As for everyone else, they are just some D list actors and actresses who have more than likely never been in a movie before. Overall, the acting was exactly what I thought it would be, terrible and over the top, though the over the top performances did manage to make me chuckle throughout the movie. So there's that...

Still of Ian Ziering jumping into a shark, yep,
I just said that.

Overall, Sharknado is just a catastrophe of a movie. Thanks to a terrible story, god awful acting and even worse special effects, Sharknado is one of those rare movies for me that could EASILY be considered the worst film ever made. Strangely however, I feel that this movie could make for a good time with friends, that's if everyone was drunk. 

OVERALL: 3.0/10